{"id":465,"date":"2024-12-14T02:46:21","date_gmt":"2024-12-14T00:46:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/noa24.press\/?p=465"},"modified":"2024-12-14T02:46:21","modified_gmt":"2024-12-14T00:46:21","slug":"a-very-cranky-old-woman-was-arrested-for-shoplifting-at-a-supermarket","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/noa24.press\/?p=465","title":{"rendered":"A very cranky old woman was arrested for shoplifting at a supermarket"},"content":{"rendered":"

A very cranky old woman was arrested for shoplifting at a supermarket.<\/p>\n

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She gave everyone a hard time, from the store manager, to the security guard, to the arresting officer who took her away.<\/p>\n

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She complained and criticized everything and everyone throughout the process.<\/p>\n

When she appeared before the judge, the judge asked her what she had stolen from the store.<\/p>\n

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The lady defiantly replied, \u201cJust a stupid can of peaches.\u201d<\/p>\n

The judge then asked why she had done it.<\/p>\n

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She replied, \u201cI was hungry and forgot to bring any cash to the store.\u201d<\/p>\n

The judge asked how many peach pieces were in the can.<\/p>\n

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She replied in a nasty tone, \u201cNine! But why do you care about that?\u201d<\/p>\n

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The judge answered patiently, \u201cWell, ma\u2019am, because I\u2019m going to give you nine days in jail \u2014 one day for each peach.\u201d<\/p>\n

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As the judge was about to drop his gavel, the lady\u2019s long-suffering husband raised his hand slowly and asked if he might speak.<\/p>\n

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The judge said, \u201cYes sir, what do you have to add?\u201d<\/p>\n

The husband said meekly,<\/p>\n

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\u201cYour Honor, she also stole a can of peas.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A very cranky old woman was arrested for shoplifting at a supermarket. She gave everyone a hard time, from the store manager, to the security guard, to… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":466,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-465","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-new"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t